feeling much better

after making some changes and a few good crys

 meeting new friends and hanging by the fire

 digging in the dirt, even if it's only a little dirt to be had

 painting (star wars shoe's for my little lovey)

and feeling the pain associated with wearing my heart on my sleeve. . .

everything is going. . .

it feels like everything is going wrong. . . . this is not at all what i want.  my son has major dental work that needs to be done.  i've never felt worse in my whole life.  my fucking stupid cat is in heat.   all things i should have taken care of before today.  today is the day and i didn't deal with it.  then i was reminded, in a round about way. . . . oh abby you can make good choices.  you can do things the right way.  you DO make good choices.  but i'm afraid i'm going to put this cat out.  like on the serious.   this is the worst thing ever.  she is the worst cat ever. 

do this chant. . .