mighty me

March of me. Marching to the beat of me. mememememememe. . . it's me me me. me me. I might have to make a meme about it.

Might be month of March processing Mighty. . . he passed. I've never been so close to someone on the other side even though he was my ex from long ago.

I found my journal from when I met Mighty (Aric) in January 2000. I was 20. We met on the 20th but I didn't write about it until "Jan 23 well really 24 by an hour forty five."

There are some parts that make me cringe a little and this next line is #1 cringe worthy: "Blues Traveler is the week of the music. Music of the week. Good." I was not sober. Sober Abby did not say this.

"Goodness, Mighty a maybe came into my life through a big chance" A MAYBE?!? Wonder how Aric would have felt about being a maybe. And the "big chance" was that his roommate and my roommate worked together at Old Chicago's on Market Street and had recently started boning.

"I don't know - time will tell. Does it being perfect exist I believe soo." Time will tell. It is not perfect.

"I see the future Today!" I don't remember that, I wish you would have elaborated.

"I can feel the artist pumping through my bod again!" It's funny an artist had been pumping through my bod earlier but that's not what I meant.  I was talking about ME. me me me. . . I was feeling inspired. Mighty was a brilliant artist.

"YES THANK GOODNESS!" (more embarrassment ahead)

"I pray, meditate, What ever today. Please Make me happy. I Believe! I can see. It's WHats for Dinner."

I thought that was it but the whole next page and half is a free flow poem or sorts:

Russell Brand is reading a study to me on Facebook right now about love, or questions to ask if it is real love or not. . .   and said "How intense are your emotions? People high in attachment anxiety, people that question their own self worth in relationships. Tend to experience a high degree of passion when romance is budding." Intense emotions huh? I didn't know about attachment theory then. I didn't even learn about attachment theory until a few years ago in therapy. Definitively a part of this era. Definitely.

So ya, I'm taking a walk down memory lane and I miss is my blogger self, I'm going to show up for that side of myself in March. I'm going to show up for the parts of myself I love. I'm going to read books I've been wanting to read. I'm going to write things. I'm going to paint things. I'm going to move my body in ways that feels good. I'm going to sit and meditate or day dream for 21 minutes a day. I'm going to surround myself with things that inspire me. Get enough rest and take care of myself for all of March. I'm marching to my own drum. I'm drumming to the beat of healing. . .

Find this poster at Boldomatic

inspiring ladies

so since my one actively crafty buddy tyler moved across the country i've been wanting to meet some more crafty people. . . i've been trying to get friends to go to a denver handmade alliance meeting/get together with me. no one would so i decided to just go by myself last night. it was the meeting of the events committee. i am now going to help by marketing the next event CRAFTY BALLYHOO! here in denver. they are collaborating with the city's "create denver week". i already met some great ladies at the meeting and next tuesday is the member's meeting. i'm trying to get some of my buddies to attend too.

so i got home last night and started doing a day of the dead painting of a figurine i got at a thrift store a'la tattoo tales and my tv died. was it a sign we just need to kill our tv? hmmm. . . it was crazy i was painting (a mary none the less) maybe it was too sacreligious

i love my love for you is a stampede of horses. i want to repost every artist it's an amazing resource.

i found this Faust the other day while searching art nouveau pictures

when looking for inspiration for my figure painting

love this was another art nouveau find, oiseau bleu

artist's date. . .

so my good buddy tyler posted this song

i totally love it! kiko went out last night and i was mopping and listening to it on my ipod at 11 pm and was dancing and cried a little bit. i'm all about crying, you gotta cry. it was more of a happy cry, kiko tells me i'm a little crazy but aren't we all?! i had a great night. . .

i painted my toe nails. . . gave myself a mini-facial. . . dry brushed. . . cold shower. . . good lotion. . .

then i hung with my friend bethany. . . so happy for her!

then i watched work of art. thank you sjp, the people on the show showed me something about myself! tyler. . . if it gets picked up again i say you and me on the show! totally perfect story for reality TV. we'd learn so much and i wouldn't get mad if you kicked my butt and i got voted off (but i would have a goal to stay at least 5 episodes!) the boys will just have to figure it out for a couple weeks.

then i saw live from abbey road with melody gardot and her story was amazing. bought her album this morning on itunes (along with james morrison)

music is amazing it can change you day, lift your mood, HEAL you! anna of free play shared some music with me for new years and it really helped me through a hard time. i'm so grateful for her sharing and tyler sharing with me. it moved me for sure!



i think i get to go celebrate pride tonight with some friends of mine and looking forward to seeing them!